Friday, April 27, 2007

wherein we wrap up a pretty decent week... for us at least

We don't suck all the time! To kick off thee weekend, here's Superchunk bashing out their little ditty, "fishing"

Thursday, April 26, 2007

wherin we preview round two

bugs we love: thee march brown

please join thee kollecktive in welcoming the march brown back to thee rivers of the western united states of america. o! the joy!

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this land is their land -- the nation's top 10 landowners

1. Ted Turner - 2 million acres
"20 properties in 10 states, a swath of America so large that it not only dwarfs Rhode Island, but also exceeds both Rhode Island and Delaware combined"
2. Archie Aldis "Red" Emmerson -- 1.722 million acres
"Emmerson set the stage for what would become Sierra Pacific Industries, an enterprise that now owns and manages 1.722 million acres of forestland in California and Washington."
3. Irving Family -- 1.2 million acres
1.2 million of the Canadian family’s more than 3 million acres are in the northeastern United States.
Read the rest of the list here

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Wednesday, April 25, 2007

submitted to thee originoo ass hooked whitey

donny beaver's "trojan horse" strategy

Thee Kollecktive recently received a copy of the Spring Ridge Club's member newsletter wherein Mr. Donny Beaver lays out his current recruitment plans in the midst of what he calls, "a lot of controversy about private property rights as they relate to fly-fishing. In particular, there has been some animosity directed toward the Club and to me personally over the years."
How does Beaver intend to handle this controversy? "We have found that the best tradeshow protocol is the “Trojan Horse” approach . . . in other words, have the Club blend into someone else’s booth."
For a few years, Beaver and Spring Ridge worked with two companies, "Angling Fantasies" and "Frontier Travel," offering anglers a few days on the river for premium prices.
Three years ago, we dropped the “outfitting angle” and decided that people had to join the Club or not fish with us. Well, that really brought out the worst in the “public.” They’d say, “You’re the greedy SOBs who charge $80,000 to join and keep us poor working slobs off the water.” So, for the past few years, we just stayed away from trade shows completely. However, we discovered that ever since we dropped the outfitting “front end” of the business, our membership recruitment pace has not grown as well as we had planned. It seems as if there is this huge perceptual leap of faith from “zero to $85,000.” On the other hand, we have tested a couple of important things in the past twelve months. • Revive the outfitting business in the East — In 2004 and 2005, we began to acquire private water MUCH faster than we could recruit new members. As a matter of fact, we have about ten miles of water lying “fallow” right now and another ten miles of water that is grossly under-utilized by Club members. For the past twelve months, we have been experimenting with controlled outfitting on our “emerging” waters (Spring Farm, Willows, Eddie’s Stretch, etc.). The name of this business is Sporting Club Exchange, what we’re now calling Logan Outfitters, and we limit access to the underutilized stretches on a strictly controlled basis. This has helped the Club in significant ways: — We have brought in nearly $100,000 in new revenues, which help to underwrite these fallow properties. —We have recruited two new members who would not have joined if not given the chance to fish for three or four days. •
Partner with Gorsuch Outfitters in Colorado — This year we also realized that actively working with an outfitter who handles highend clients could help significantly with Club recruitment. We anticipate attracting at least 25 new Club members to the Colorado Club in 2007, thanks to this relationship. To make a long story short, we have decided to make Gorsuch and Logan Outfitters the “face” of our trade show booths for 2007 (in Denver, Somerset, New Jersey, and Marlboro, Massachusetts). The “inner sanctum” in the back of each booth will be our “Club headquarters” at the shows. It will be closed off from the general public and be open by invitation only to potential Club members. We will be running our DVD on a loop, we have Club literature available, and we will have a scrapbook of photos available for viewing. This is also where we can use your help. If we do have people come into the Club Room, it will be most helpful if a current member is available for conversation by potential members. We see the “front of the booth” as this busy, active, bustling outfitter face and the “back of the booth” as a quiet sanctuary where we can discuss the Club concept with folks in privacy.
IMPORTANT POINTS TO REMEMBER: —Outfitter customers do NOT fish our Legacy waters; only those stretches of under-utilized or emerging waters not typically fished by members.

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holy jesus! thee dog that walks on two legs

Granted, we have posted some wierd shit on thee olde ass hooked whitey, but this one takes the cake. We have now seen everything.

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thee rodsman

Monday, April 23, 2007

digression: thee bonny prince

After a morning of furious blogging action, we leave thee reader wiff this amazing clip of bonny prince billy playing a gorgeous old ballad. amazing sound, amazing video quality, wonderfully beautiful song.

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update: spring ridge club begins its appeal

Fly fishing's public enemy #1 has begun its appeal in the Little Juanita case. According to the Pittsburgh Post Gazette, on oral hearing prior to the appeal was to take place 4/18. Quotes? Oh, we've got quotes:
"To this date, we have never shut off a single inch of water that was publicly accessible," Beaver said. "It was already private property before we got there. Our strategy has been, if it's closed, then what am I taking? Actually, I'm opening it up to 120 members who brought in almost 2,000 guests last year."

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wherin we survey the fly fishing blog scene

Fly fishing blogs. We are surely blessed, no? All the rich variety of an old outhouse. Cranks, misfits, looney tunes and squalid criminals all brought together like some virtual bouquet. Take a breath... breathe it in... OK,, let's go!
The Water Swatters is a pretty swell new blog. Good typing, funny, subversive. Yup, we is gonna add them to the sidebar.
"The Hinge" who is/was something of a "personality" on the pits of despair known as fly fishing bulletin boards has a newish blog called Loghova. Funny. Little to no fly fishing content -- which can only be a good thing.
No posts on teh windknot since March 8? Whisky. Tango. Foxtrot.
And speaking of good blogs with too few posts... well, we're looking at yuo Sir Jackson...
Voluntary Beatdown are back from their recent unfortunate spate of "work". Good to have them back.
Way Upstream is a newish blog. Thee Kolleckktive senses some potential here...
James Pio has a new blog. It's called "troutgrass".
Did you know that Wally over at Flytimes almost died after flipping over his boat on the Clark Fork. Yikes!!!
And finally... a big congrats to Tom over at Trout Underground who is kinda/sorta celebrating what may or may not be his first anniversary. Huzzah!!!
Did we miss your blog? Post in comments...

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Friday, April 20, 2007

holy jesus! teach your dog to fetch beer!!!

We certainly don't need another reason to praise the dog, do we? Answer: No. Way. But consider for a moment your dog going to the fridge, opening it, getting a beer and bringing it to daddy... Just hold the picture there in you mind. Savor it. Roll it over and over. It's Delicious, innit? IT CAN BE DONE!
Money Quote:
Complex fetching tricks are the mark of a very smart dog. If you've ever had the pleasure of being served a beer by dog you know how amazing this trick seems.
In reality, it doesn't take a smart dog... just a patient owner to teach this trick.

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Thursday, April 19, 2007

Capr! Capr! Capr!

Ahhh... we are getting close. Down there in Oregon, John Montana is grabbing up the caprs (and breaking fly rods). That's old timey fly fishing, friends!

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wherein we discuss an artist even fly fishers may "get"

Andy Goldsworthy is a Scotsman who builds impermanent art in teh great outdoors. Petal rings, looping stone walls, twig sculptures, weird shit with leaves... very lovely and for it's here-today-gone-tomorrow lifespan, all the more beautiful/poignant. Anyway, the link is to a short piece from his documentary Rivers and Tides wherein Andy builds a driftwood sculpture at an old salmon fishing hole only to watch the tide take it away a few hours later. Wonderful.

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digression: American culture

The other evening, Thee Kollecktive screened the film Instrument, a ten-year-in-the-making collaboration between the band Fugazi and director Jem Cohen. Most of the Kollecktive thought the film an artful, multi-media blend with surprisingly beautiful shots. The rest of the Kollective just thought it kicked much ass. But what the hell ever happened to Fugazi, anyway? Their last album, after all, was released way back in 2001. Well, according to Wikipedia, the band are on "hiatus". But dig this fans of post-hardcore dub n' punk, the band has recently released a series of 30 live shows on CD. 30 LIVE SHOWS!!! We have taken up a Kollection and are about to order a couple. Review to follow. Anyway, we just felt you should know this.

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Tuesday, April 17, 2007

puget sound anglers only -- if you are not a puget sound angler, kindly move along

Thee Kollective just stumbled across this rather bitching website called "Gravel Beaches" wherein we are given tours of Puget Sound gravel beaches. But as the website explains, "not really just gravel, but sand, broken shell, and occasionally a boulder the size of a large truck." We will assume readers of thee originoo ass hooked whitey will now what to do wiff this information. And of course, no charge, holmes...

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ever seen a cow eat a little baby chicken?

you have now. please enjoy!

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Thursday, April 12, 2007

wherein we are very godamm sorry but we are really busy

we been busy, fercripesakes! Cut it wiff the emails, cut it with the IMs. We are still here. But likes we said, we been busy! Until our regular level of genius resumes, please enjoy Stompin' Toim Connors and a bit of playoff hockey.

Friday, April 06, 2007

a river ain't too much to love

wow... thee kollecktive is blown away by this 169% kickass clip. as good an easter message as you is gonna see, son, even it it does come from a buncha godless fishermen. have a good weekend. we'll try to do better next week.

holy jesus! baby ducky feeds the capr!!!

Obviously, these are not wild columbian basin tiger carp, for if they were, this would be a bloody scene indeed, and not a bit cute.

no fishing at thee kompound saturday

michigan state vs. boston college for all the chicklets. note to BC: bring a baggie fo yo teef.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

yesterday on the yakima river

thee mindless destruction of a fly rod

our man in portland, jayj, sends this video of steve rajeff owning the shit out an a Echo 6 and a half foot 3 wt.

Monday, April 02, 2007

where have you gone, tom paciorek?

That's it for today. We'll be in section 315, oscillating wildly.

and then you die (part 3, death by tako!)

why do you think they call it the Klan?

Fly fishing bulletin board: Gathering of the Klan
Post title: OK, I'll be racist or whatever
Author: Imperial Wizard Colston Newton
Contents: But can anybody take Speedy Gonzales seriously as Attorney General?

holy jesus! thai hookers, deep space and a half-rack of Rainer -- AHW returns!

The funny thing is, our April Fool's frolic generated more traffic at FR&R's web "effort" than they've seen since... well, um... ever. TRUFF!

Sunday, April 01, 2007

wherein thee ass hooked whitey sells out

This is a rather difficult post for thee Kollecktive to write -- and one that has been in the works for a while now -- so we might as well come right out and say it: This is the final post for AHW on blogspot. Starting tomorrow we will begin posting as part of Fly Rod and Reel's new/improved web effort -- and, bonus -- we get to pen the back of the book "Sporting Life" column 3x a year.

A lot of thought has gone into this decision but it basically boils down to this: If we can keep thee Kollecktive in legumes and tofu via our writing, we will do it. Sure, AHW will change. We will no longer be able to make fun of the knobs over at The Klan, talk of thai hookers will be out and we'll have to sever our relationship with other blogs. But the reality is, we'll still bring you the best in all the world of flyfishing.

See yuo tomorrow over at FR&R!

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